A little over a week ago I publicly came out as asexual on this blog and on Facebook with a post titled Coming Out From the Edge of the Bell Curve. I really didn't have to do that, it's a way that I am different that is actually pretty easy to hide. I am 54, single, white, male, never married, and while that does get an occasional surprised response I have never faced any real hatred or bigotry because of it. I fit in pretty well, so why come out? Part of it was for myself, even though I have had low sexual attraction my whole life I had never encountered others that I KNEW where like me, I never could name it, or have a label for it until I ran across an article about Demi-sexuality (only being sexually attracted to people that you have a strong emotional bond with) and that led to AVEN (or the Asexual Visibility and Education Network) and other resources. This was tremendous for me, it let me know that I am far from alone, that I am not broken or damaged, I may not be in the "normal" range of what most people are on the sexuality bell curve, but I am still on it, I have not fallen off! It has also given me resources and information to move forward with my life with better understanding and more knowledge of who or what I am. That is wonderful. But even more important to me as I wrote a few days ago in Why Should You Care? "I feel that the more people come out in dimensions of their lives where they do not fall into the "normal" range of a bell curve, the more that frees others to come out as well. Not just in that dimension, but in many dimensions. " Simply said; life is not simple or binary, it is complex and diverse, and that is beautiful, it should be celebrated. I saw again today a video I wanted to share that really drives that home. It is called Something Beautiful. The voice and words are those of Nathan Phelps. Nathan is a son of Fred Phelps the founder of the infamous Westboro Baptist Church, a group known best for picketing events such as funerals with signs such as "God Hates Fags". Nathan escaped that and has become an advocate for love, justice, and acceptance. An advocate for celebrating the diversity of life. It is Something Beautiful to watch... This video is a poignant and powerful reminder that we can do so much better than we often do. That rather than seeing hate and fear in our differences, we can see something beautiful, and that would make life so much better.
Much Gratitude to Nathan Phelps and Seth Andrews for making this powerful video. The original is here on YouTube if you want to share it directly with others from there. It is on Seth Andrews The Thinking Atheist Channel which is full of many other great video's and podcasts. Including two podcasts with Nathan Phelps #155 The Death of My Father and #67 Escaping Westboro Baptist Church, both very powerful and moving. Nate's website is here at NatePhelps.com. He is a powerful Ally for all of us.
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